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April 14, 2010

HIDDEN MEANINGS IN COMPANY TALk

ONE LINER -- HIDDEN MEANINGS IN COMPANY TALK 
Today's Professional Management FUNDAS.



1. "We will do it" means "You will do it"

2. "You have done a great job" means "More work to be given to you"

3."We are working on it" means "We have not yet started working on the same"

4."Tomorrow first thing in the morning" means "Its not getting done "At least not tomorrow!"

5."After discussion we will decide-I am very open to views" means "I have already decided, I will tell you what to do"

6."There was a slight miscommunication" means "We had actually lied"

7."Lets call a meeting and discuss" means "I have no time now, will talk later"

8."We can always do it" means "We actually cannot do the same on time"

9."We are on the right track but there needs to be a slight extension of the deadline" means "The project is screwed up, we cannot deliver on time."

10."We had slight differences of opinion "means "We had actually fought"

11."Make a list of the work that you do and let's see how I can help you" means "Anyway you have to find a way out no help from me"

12."You should have told me earlier" means "Well even if you told me earlier that would have made hardly any difference!"

13."We need to find out the real reason" means "Well I will tell you where your fault is"

14."Well Family is important; your leave is always granted. Just ensure that the work is not affected," means, "Well you know..."

15."We are a team," means, "I am not the only one to be blamed"

16."That's actually a good question" means "I do not know anything about it"

17."All the Best" means "You are in trouble"


April 08, 2010

A smart Guy and his Boss

A smart Guy and his Boss were traveling towards New York in a train. Just Opposite to their seat, a beautiful girl was sitting along with her grandma. With in some time, eye-eye interactions started between the boy & girl. After some moments, train started moving into a tunnel and it was very dark. 
  Suddenly, everybody heard a kiss sound followed by a slapping. Every body remained silent, when the train came out of the tunnel. 
   Grandma thought that," The Guy is a rogue; how dare is he? He has kissed my grand daughter! But my Grand daughter is genuine; she immediately slapped that guy." 
     Boss thought that," I can't believe that this guy has kissed that girl! But it is unfair that she slapped me by mistake" 
   That girl thought that," I feel happy, when that guy kissed me, but I feel sorry that my grandma has slapped him". 
     U know….what that clever guy did and what he was thinking

…………………………….. .
 ..   …. ………  ……………. …………………. 
…………………….. …………………………….  ……………………………
...............................................................……… ……………………………………… 
  **This one minute in my life is wonderful, it hardly comes...because, that a time I have kissed a girl and also I have slapped my Boss.**

April 06, 2010

Cool Thought of the day !!!






Jai Nithyananda Swami









                                                                                                 Nithyananda Swami jokes

April 05, 2010

Psycho The Rapist

One day Mr.Joe goes to a library and asks for a book

The beautiful librarian asks him the name of the book...

        Joe Says: "Psycho The Rapist"
Librarian searches for the book for a long time, comes back and slaps Joe and says: You idiot, it is 'Psychotherapist".            

I am ?

Hi,

Doing nothing?

Then Make a Place,

4 Me in ur Heart!!

I May come there any time!

Ur's Faithfully,

"HeArT aTtAcK"

April 01, 2010

Why April 1 is called as FOOL’S day?

April 1 is called as FOOL’S day after Steve April.
 He was born on 1st April 1579 in Cristchurch. Son of the owner of a textile chain Brian and Co. Fabrics, he always had a passion to try out various innovative things in life. 
He did 105 businesses in his life time. 
He married an old woman at the age of 22. 
Due to his adventure in business, he even lost the property earned by his dad and by 1629, he was bankrupt and was blacklisted by all financial agencies then. 
He was an epitome of foolishness and people started to call him as master of fools. 
He also used to read all sorts of fake stories like you did just now.
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